Theological and Ethical Discourses 1 part 15/27

(...) So it will assuredly be for me, wretched and lowly as I am first of all — I hesitate to say it — and for all of you as well, if, while abstaining from wicked deeds and actions, we do not with all our strength acquire the virtues in their place, to such a degree that we become perfect men and attain to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, just as Paul commands that we should all become.

For if we do not become such, how shall we be able to serve the Lord?

How shall we be able to serve as soldiers for Christ?

And how shall we be armed spiritually and be enrolled in the battle-line of the living God, and appear formidable to our enemies?

Let no one, then, suppose that by fasting or keeping vigil, or hungering or thirsting, or sleeping on the bare ground, or mourning or weeping, or enduring the insults and temptations that come upon him, he is thereby serving God, or bestowing some favor upon someone else through such things.

Rather, he benefits only himself — and even this, only if he endures and pursues these things in humility and spiritual knowledge.

And how this is so, whoever wishes may learn through all the divine Scriptures.

For we are only intent on showing this: that neither those who spend time in repentance nor those who spend time in ascetic labor are serving the Lord, but rather they benefit themselves and bestow favor only upon themselves.

Whom do we mean by those who serve an earthly king?

Those who go about in their own homes, or those who follow him about everywhere?

Those who spend their time on their own country estates, or those who are enrolled in the armies?

Those who recline at ease, live luxuriously, and squander their lives at home, or those who show valor in wars (...) and are struck, and at times also strike and slay many of the enemy, and rescue their fellow-servants who have been taken captive, and put the enemy to shame?

Is it not perfectly clear that these, rather than those, are the ones serving the earthly king?

For a blacksmith, a goldsmith, and a carpenter, if they perform some work for the king, receive their agreed-upon wage from his officials and return home like strangers and outsiders, having neither seen the king nor having any acquaintance of friendship whatsoever with him;

whereas others are indeed friends of the king, and through them the people who are under each one of them are governed.

In this way, then, understand for me also the case of the heavenly King and of those who serve him.

But those who gratefully and with all their strength keep his commandments, and through this display firm faith toward him, are called good and are termed faithful; while those who, though carelessly and slothfully, still choose to serve him, are called wicked and slothful; and those who do or say things contrary to his ordinances are enemies and adversaries, even though they are weak and have no power whatsoever against him.

We, then, having heard the Lord saying:

'Whoever wishes to come after me, let him deny himself and take up (...) his cross and follow me' — and having heard the Apostle teaching:

'Little children, do not love the world, nor the things that are in the world;'

'for the love of the world is enmity toward God'; and that:

'He who loves the world has become an enemy of God' — having, at least in appearance, forsaken all things, we followed our Savior and God; or rather, since the world was an obstacle to us for virtue, we withdrew to the solitary life, as though leaving behind the hostile land in which we had dwelt as captives, having willingly fled it, and we crossed over into the country of our Master and King, Christ, putting on only the outward form of the people who belong to him — yet not thereby having become his soldiers or servants merely through this garment, just as those who wear a uniform identical to soldiers' are not, for that reason, actually soldiers of the king. Rather, we say only that we have thus far come to be under his kingdom, having put on the monastic garment; we do not, however, say that we have thereby become his soldiers, because our weapons are not bodily but spiritual.

For our struggle is not against blood and flesh, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.

When, therefore, we put on the armor of light — the shield and the helmet and the rest, which holy Paul enumerated — and take in our hands the sharpened sword of the Spirit, then indeed we say that we have become soldiers, and we prepare ourselves for battle-array.

But for now, we who have put on the monastic garment and entered the arena of repentance and asceticism — let us consider, if you please, what it is we are actually accomplishing.

Surely so that we may receive forgiveness of our sins — (...) and not only that, but also be cleansed of the defilements arising from them.

Do we keep vigil and sing psalms?

So that we may not be taken captive in mind by the enemy, and so that we may attain to thinking good thoughts and praying spiritually and unceasingly in our understanding at all times.

Surely so that we may come to enjoy the joy that arises from mourning.

Do we wear cheap and ragged clothing, sleep on the ground, and do many of us bind our bodies with iron chains?

It is surely so that we may break and burden this vigorous body, and not allow it, like some untamed colt without a bridle to restrain it, to rush headlong to a precipice and hurl itself, together with its rider the mind, down into the pit of destruction and eternal fire.

But in doing these things, what favor, then, do we bestow upon those who see us?

And if not even to those who see us, how much less then to him who has granted us both wisdom and power that we might save ourselves.

But do we endure with thanksgiving, and without bearing grudges, the reviling and afflictions that come upon us?

And in this too, again, we benefit ourselves and no one else.

And hear the Lord saying this:

'If you do not forgive men their trespasses from your hearts, neither will your heavenly Father forgive you your trespasses.'

We bestow favor upon ourselves, receiving forgiveness for the sins we have committed against God;

but if we bear grudges and try in various ways (...) to repay them, we harm ourselves, causing our own sins to remain unforgiven.

Do we sit in a cell, flee to the mountains, dwell in caves, and stand elevated upon pillars?

Surely we do so hastening to escape the one who walks about like a lion, roaring dreadfully against us and seeking whom he may devour.

If, then, God should grant it — for without his help we shall not be able, wherever we may go, to escape that one's teeth and manifold snares — and we are saved, not becoming food for this dreadful beast, how then can we say that by such actions we are serving the Lord?

To me this does not seem reasonable, nor, I think, does it to you either.

For how could someone who is being pursued by another, and who himself is fleeing with all his might, say that he has 'served' the one who received him into his own house and stood before the doors and delivered him from the enemy who was pursuing him — say this on that account alone?

By no means; rather, having been benefited by him and delivered from his enemy, he ought to render thanksgiving to him continually.

And tell me, how shall beggar-poor people, whether through bodily weakness or through idleness and unwillingness to work through sloth, be reckoned to be serving those who give them alms and minister to them — and shall it not rather appear that the poor are freely ministered to and served by those who are merciful?

In just this way, then, we all likewise, being poor and needy on account of our past transgressions, being in such a state, could never say that we are 'serving' the God who has mercy on us, since, as has been said, some are poor because of past sins, others because of evil habit, others because of sloth and idleness with regard to God's commandments, others through wicked choice, others through preoccupation with pleasures, others through ignorance (...) and unbelief of the divine Scriptures, and others through conceit and the supposition that they need nothing further for the salvation of their soul — and, simply put, we are all poor and naked.

And not only that, but we are also wounded, held fast by various sicknesses, and, as it were lying pitiably in various hospices and infirmaries within our very cells and monasteries, or barely able to walk about, we cry out and lament and weep, and call upon him, the physician of souls and bodies — that is, as many of us as have gained some awareness of the pain of our wounds or passions, since there are also some who are like the demented, not even knowing that they are sick at all, or that they are held fast by some passion — so that he may come and heal our wounded hearts and give health to our souls, lying beneath the bed of sin and death, since, according to the divine Apostle, we have all sinned, and we stand in need of his mercy and grace.

Shall we, then, dare to say that we are 'serving' him who has mercy on us, being in such a state as has been said, and who has compassion on us and heals our souls, and teaches us the things pertaining to salvation, and gradually grants us health from our wounds and sicknesses?

By no means — just as the man whose body was beaten by robbers and who lay half-dead is not said to have 'served' the one who lifted him onto his own beast, led him to the inn, and applied wine and oil to him, but rather is said to have been shown mercy, healed, and restored through him to his former health.

Therefore, since we ourselves are enfeebled and maimed and wounded, and neglect the things pertaining to our own healing, and, as I have said, are in every way eager not to do them, how shall we dare to say or even to think that we are serving the Lord?

We beseech him — (...) as I have already said — if indeed we perceive at all the state we are in, imploring to be healed of our sicknesses.

We shall be clothed, that is, from head to the very soles of our feet; then, ourselves ministering to others with wine and oil and the rest of the poultices and remedies, healing them, we shall be reckoned to be serving the Lord himself, who has said thus:

'Inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these my brethren, you did it to me.'

But if we are not first in such a state, but, while still sick, attempt to do this, the Master will answer and say to us:

But when you hear us calling the health of the soul a 'shining double garment,' do not out of ignorance mock the expression, nor suppose that we mean by it bodily health, but rather a certain incorporeal, divine, intelligible health, which does not customarily come from medicines and herbs, nor from any works, lest anyone should boast.

For just as someone joining dead bone to bone and joint to joint — you may take these to represent works and the acquisition of virtue — accomplishes nothing, if there is no one able to weave flesh and sinews upon them; and even if he does this, binding the joints together with sinews and clothing those dead bones with flesh and skin and completing them into a body, still there will be no benefit whatsoever, since it is deprived of the spirit that gives it life and moves it, that is, since it is bereft of a soul — so also, understand for me the soul that is dead, and turn your mind to the interior of its members, and see all its actions gathered together, I mean fasting and vigil, sleeping on the ground and lying on dry rushes, (...) non-possession and abstaining from bathing, and the things that follow these — like dead bones, being fitted together with one another, and following one upon another, and being composed together, and thus somehow forming the complete body of the soul.

What benefit, then, is there, if it lies lifeless and breathless, the Holy Spirit not being in it?

For it is only that Spirit, coming into us and dwelling within, that binds together — like lifeless members scattered apart from one another — our virtuous actions that have thus become dead, with the sinews of spiritual strength, and unites them by love toward God; and it is then that he shows us to be new instead of old, and living instead of dead.

Otherwise, it is not possible for the soul to live.

For just as it is impossible for our body, whether it be sick or not, to move without a soul, or to live at all, so too the soul, whether it has sinned or not, is dead without the Holy Spirit, and cannot live the eternal life at all;

for if sin is the sting of death, then whoever has sinned has assuredly been struck by it and has died;

and if no one is without sin — 'for all,' it says, 'have sinned and fall short of the glory of God' — then clearly all of us, having sinned, have died and are dead.

Tell me, then, how you could truly live, without being united to the true life, that is, to the Holy Spirit, through whom every believer is regenerated and made alive again in Christ.

'For I,' he says, 'am the truth and the resurrection and the life.'

The servants and disciples of Christ are light, and truth, and life;

For, it says, he who receives you receives me;

If, then, we are dead, and he alone is eternal life, then before being united to him and living, let us not say that we serve the Lord.

Unless we have knowingly put him on like a double garment, let us not suppose that we have been at all delivered from our sicknesses or from the passions that trouble us.

For just as darkness does not flee unless light comes, so too the sickness of the soul is not put to flight unless he who bears our infirmities comes and is united to us.

And he, in coming, since he drives away every sickness and every infirmity of the soul, is called health, granting us the health of the soul;

and enlightening us, he is called light, being above all light;

and giving us life, he is called life, being above all life;

and warming us, he is called a garment, and thus we say that we put on him who is in every way untouchable and ungraspable;

and being united unconfusedly to our soul and making it wholly like light, he is said to dwell in us and, though uncircumscribable, to be circumscribed.

Thus, therefore, he who is above all things becomes all things to us — bread, shelter, and water, which of old he told the Samaritan woman would never again let the one who drank it thirst.

If, then, you still thirst, you have not yet drunk of that water;

for he who said this does not lie.

For I heard a certain man say that, from the time the loving Master granted him to drink his fill of this water, if it happened that he forgot and, as though he had not drunk, sought again to be given drink by him, that very water — the water he had plainly drunk — would leap up from within his heart and spring up like a stream of light, and at once he would see it.

And that water, as it were, spoke within me through its throbbings, and said:

'Do you not see me, that I am here with you?

And why do you seek that I be given to you, or that I come to you from somewhere else?

Do you not know that I am always present with those to whom I have once given myself to drink, and that I become in them an immortal spring?'

If, then, you have known this to have happened also in you, O brother, you are blessed.

But if you have beheld Christ, yet he has not yet granted you to drink this draught, fall down, weep, entreat, lament, strike your own face, as Adam once did, tear the hair of your head;

do not lie down upon a bed, but let the bare ground be your bed;

do not give your eyes their fill of sleep, nor any slumber at all to your eyelids;

do not turn your eye toward anything on earth or in heaven — for what have you to do with anything else, when you see before your eyes the maker of all things?

never fill your belly with food;

do not sweeten your throat with pleasurable food or drink to the point of satiety;

do not busy yourself with what others are doing, nor look toward those who live carelessly and contemptuously, lest you fall into self-conceit or even condemn them;

indeed, never sit down with them for untimely conversation;

do not go about seeking out renowned monks, nor investigate their lives; but if by God's grace you have met with a spiritual father, tell him alone the things that concern you;

but if not, then, looking upon Christ, gaze always upon him, and have him alone, forever, as the beholder of your dejection and affliction.

Show him — or rather, let him see — your unwashed state, your utter lack of possessions, your manner free of the love of money.

Nor, even if all the wealth of the world should flow from somewhere, or a great heap of gold be thrown before your feet — for this too comes about through the contrivance of the Evil One and his fellow-workers and shield-bearers — should you be willing even to turn your eye and look at it at all, even if it seems, under the pretext of the poor, to be received and given by you without sin.

And when you have been deemed worthy of this, then you will know the things we are speaking and the things we are setting forth to guide you.

For, as it is said, we speak wisdom — not the wisdom of this age that is passing away, but we speak the wisdom of God in a mystery, the wisdom that has been hidden.

But if you have not even been deemed worthy at all to see Christ himself, on what basis do you suppose that you are alive?

On what basis do you suppose that you serve him whom you have not yet beheld?

And since you have neither beheld him nor been deemed worthy to hear his voice, from where will you be taught his holy, well-pleasing, and perfect will?

But if you say you will learn this from the holy Scriptures, I ask how you, being wholly dead and lying in darkness, will be able to hear it or fulfill it, so that you may be deemed worthy both to live and to see God.

For if we pass our life in darkness, how shall we have the strength to live, or how shall we behold Christ, the true light, who has come upon the earth?

But humble yourself before God and say:

'Lord, who dost not desire the death of the sinner so much as that he should turn and live, who for this cause didst come down upon the earth, that thou mightest raise up those who lie dead, slain by sin, and mightest grant them to behold thee, the true light, insofar as it is possible for man to see — send me a man who knows thee, so that, serving him as I would serve thee, and submitting myself to him with all my strength, and doing thy will in his will, I too, a sinner, may be well-pleasing to thee, the only God, and may be deemed worthy of thy kingdom.'

If, then, you persist thus, knocking with all your soul and strength, entreating and beseeching him, he will not abandon you, but either through himself or through one of his servants he will teach you all that you must do, and through his grace and the prayer of his servant he will grant you strength to fulfill it.

For apart from him you can do nothing;

but he, as I have already said, will become all things to you without fail;

but if you do not yet find all things by seeking Christ in your going forth, then at least, submitting yourself to his friends and rulers and serving, may you be found through them to be serving him; then at least fulfilling the will of the servants of God and not your own will — for the will of God's servants is the will of God — then at least in labor and not in idleness, then at least in humility and not in self-conceit.

Remember what I said, that all the generals and rulers are — some, servants, others, friends — of the king, and that through these same men the people who stand under each one of them likewise serve him;

who, even if they do not see the king face to face and meet with him, yet by serving well their general or ruler as though he were the king himself, hope to receive gifts and honors from the king through them; and some do indeed receive them, putting forward their own rulers as mediators.

There are also those who, through their own valor and virtue, become renowned and are taken up by the king and honored, and are established as rulers and mediators over others, and then are deemed worthy to render personal service to the king himself, face to face, and to converse with him, and to hear his voice.

But if you, as has been said, cannot bear to seek and to knock, but instead have been eager to become one of the nameless soldiers — that is, an insignificant subordinate ranked among the insignificant — and are unwilling to be in service to spiritual rulers, why do you blame me for calling you dead, or blind, or weak and enfeebled, and cut off from the service of Christ the King?

'But,' you might say, 'I sit in my cell, attending to myself and wronging no one in any way.'

But would you yourself allow your own slave or servant to do this very thing — to despise your service, go off, and sit in another cell, wronging no one, not even you?

But would any other man endure to hear this at all?

How then, sitting in your cell and being served by others, do you say that you serve God?

For even if you served yourself in all things, and from the works of your own hands had everything the body needed, not even then would it be right for you to say that you serve God.

For a servant is not praised for feeding and clothing himself, but rather, if he does not each day provide from his labor what is commonly called the due payment to his own master, he is punished and condemned as useless.

How then do we, living as free men, giving ourselves over to ease and negligence and indolence, not only doing nothing and serving no one, but even grumbling at every hour if we are not waited on by others, say that we serve God and wrong no one?

'Depart from me, you cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels.'

'For I was hungry' — and having enumerated the rest — 'I was sick,' he said, 'and you did not minister to me.'

How then, or with what face, shall we behold him when he comes to examine each one's work?

God is fire, and he came as fire and cast it upon the earth;

and this fire goes about seeking to seize upon fuel — that is, a good purpose and resolve — and to fall upon it and be kindled.

And in those in whom it is kindled, it rises into a great flame and reaches even to the heavens, and does not allow the one who has been set ablaze to be idle at all or to rest.

Nor does it burn the soul that has been set on fire without perception, as some suppose is the case with the dead — for it is not insensate matter — but at first with perception, awareness, and unbearable pain;

but afterward, once we have been made completely pure from the defilement of the passions, it becomes for us food and drink, illumination and joy unceasingly within us, and by participation makes us ourselves light.

For just as a kiln being fired at first grows rather more blackened from the smoke sent forth by the material, but when it has been thoroughly heated it becomes wholly translucent and like fire itself, and thereafter receives no blackness at all from the smoke by participation, so too the soul that has begun to burn with divine longing is, at first, so kindled that it beholds, in the fire of the Spirit, the gloom of the passions being sent forth from within itself like smoke, and sees mirrored in itself the blackness that comes upon it from this, and laments; and it fully perceives its thorny reasonings and its brushwood-like preconceptions being burned up and reduced utterly to ashes;

but when these have been consumed and only the soul's own essence remains, apart from passion, then the divine and immaterial fire is also united to it essentially;

and at once it is kindled and shines through and partakes of that fire, just as the kiln partakes of this sensible fire;

thus also the body, partaking of the divine and ineffable light, itself too becomes fire by participation.

But this will never happen in us unless we abhor the world and all things in the world, and, according to the word of the Lord, lose our own souls.

For that fire is never kindled in us in any other way;

and those who have received it were not only completely delivered from the sicknesses of the soul, but also, having come forth from the nets of the devil, healed many others who were spiritually sick and weak, and brought them as gifts to the Master, Christ.

For from that divine fire, these men, having been wisely taught all knowledge and all art, were well-pleasing to God in all things, in all their life and in their whole manner of living — such as was Peter, the divine apostle, who received the keys of the kingdom; such was Paul, who was caught up to the third heaven; and in like manner the divine apostles thereafter.

Such also were our holy and God-bearing fathers and teachers, who by this divine fire annihilated the heresies as though they were thorns, who commanded the demons as though they were worthless and feeble slaves (and those demons, obeying them with fear, have become such and are always becoming such), who loved God so much that they did not even spare their own soul.

These men, therefore, and all who like them are said to have served and to be ever serving God — these are so called; but those who are still liable to sins are not, but rather resemble wicked servants who have offended their own master.

And those who are still troubled by the passions resemble men who are ever fighting and those who resist or wrestle.

It remains, evidently, that they also receive the grace of the Spirit from Christ the heavenly King, just as soldiers receive their rations from an earthly king.

And then, as men who have already become perfect, having grown up to the stature of Christ and the measure thereof, and having been enrolled among his soldiers and servants, we shall go forth to war against the hostile enemies, since, as Paul the divine apostle says, no one ever goes to war at his own expense.

If, then, we too should fail to receive from God the bread that comes down from heaven and gives life to the world — that is, the grace of the Spirit (for this is the spiritual ration by which those enlisted for Christ are nourished, and which they spiritually put on instead of weapons) — how, tell me, shall we go out to the battle line of God, or how shall we be enrolled among his servants?

But come, let us arise, as many as wish to flee from the slavery of the passions and run to Christ, the true Master, that you may also be styled his servants.

And let us too be zealous to become such as the discourse has already described beforehand.

Let us therefore not despise our salvation, nor deceive ourselves, nor make excuses in our sins, saying:

'This is impossible; in the present generation no one could ever become such.'

Let us not, then, philosophize against our own salvation, nor make rhetorical speeches against our own souls.

For it is possible, if we are willing, and to such a degree that the will alone suffices to raise us up to so great a height.

For where, it is said, there is a ready will, nothing hinders.

God wills to make us gods out of men — willing ones, though, and not unwilling.

And do we shrink back, shaking off this benefaction?

And of what folly is this not a sign, or of madness and the utmost senselessness?

For God wills this so much that, going forth from the bosom of his blessed Father without ever departing from it, he came down and came to earth for this very purpose.

If, then, we too shall be willing, nothing whatsoever will be able to hinder us in this.

Let us only set out toward him through fervent repentance, and he, drawing near to us and touching our hearts with his immaculate finger alone, will kindle the lamps of our souls and will no longer allow them to be extinguished, unto the consummation of the age and beyond, unto the ages — for to him belongs all glory, honor, and worship, now and unto the unending ages of ages.