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He was secure of victory, who begged that they would spare; nor was he a stranger to natural affection, who did not think that even his impious son ought to perish. He wept and with great grief lamented the death of the parricide, saying: 'My son Absalom, who will give me death in your stead, my son Absalom?' He thought that one ought to be avenged who had been slain for the vengeance of fatherly affection. How patient indeed of injury and of grief was he! He gave way, that, as I said, hemmed in by the fury of his son Absalom, with valiant warriors on his right hand and his left, a man whose name was Shimei cursed him, calling him a bloody man and a man of blood, justly cast down from the kingdom by the judgment of the Lord: but he was not even moved by such reproaches, though his companions were moved.
In short, one of his companions — Abishai was the man's name — threatened that he would take off the man's head as the price of the injury. But the king, turning to Abishai, said: 'What is it to me and to you, son of Zeruiah? Therefore he curses me, because the Lord has told him to curse.' How morally he taught that the times of our injuries or dangers are the contests of temptations and the trials of probations, and that therefore they are not wont to be inflicted without the divine judgment! The good athlete is exercised by reproaches, he is exercised by labors and dangers, that he may be worthy of the crown of righteousness to be conferred on him. And therefore the things that are thought adverse must be borne patiently. In short, divine Scripture teaches you this elsewhere also, when it says to the just man:
'If we have received good things from the hand of the Lord, why should we not also endure the evil things?' And the holy prophet added, saying: 'Behold, my son, who came forth from my womb, seeks my life. But if the Benjamite curses me, let him alone that he may curse, since the Lord has told him to, that He may see my humiliation, and the Lord will repay me good for this cursing.' O depth of prudence, O signal mark of patience, O great device for swallowing down insult! 'Are you moved, Abishai,' he says, 'because a stranger curses me, whom my son seeks with parricide? The Lord has told him to curse me. But the Lord is not given to cursing, nor does He delight in insults.' See how carefully he guards each point.
He does not accuse the Lord as the author of the injury, but rather praises Him because he suffers it. We are to endure lesser things, that we may obtain pardon of greater sins. Behold, the verbal insult of the parricide lightened his affliction, it absolved the impudent man, whose curses profit the more, being granted with a divine recompense. Who would not compensate himself for such an injury, that whom man had hurt, God might console with the recompense of better things? Let us also consider his other deeds. He fought against the offspring of giants, when one of them had almost struck down the king as he was engaged in battle; yet the daring adversary paid for it with the price of his received death.
This triumph too over the fierce conquered nation having been won, again in the valley of the Titans he undertook a fearful war, no less against the enemy than against nature. For being thirsty while he was engaged in war, he had nothing to drink. 'Who,' he says, 'will give me drink from the cistern that is in Bethlehem by the gates?' But between the cistern and holy David there flowed the enemy and the midst of the hostile camp's enclosures. Three men cut through the multitude of the adversaries and filled water from the cistern that was in Bethlehem, and offered it to the king to drink.
But the king refused to drink and poured it out to the Lord — for it was worthy of so great a service that what was a token of living valor should become a sacrifice of piety — and he uttered a saying worthy of the prophetic spirit: 'Let it not befall me to do this, that I should drink the blood of the men who went out at the peril of their lives.' He conquered nature, therefore, so that though thirsty he did not drink, and he gave an example from himself by which the whole army might learn to endure thirst. He also trained his subjects to the office of virtue, so that even through dangers the soldiers might obey the royal command as volunteers.
But that he refused to drink declared that he had given the command for the sake of proving the soldiers, not by the necessity of conquering his thirst; that he had also taken precaution lest the use of drinking be sought by any of the kings at the peril of others; and finally that he had deprecated the wound of a pious conscience, because water sought at the cost of so many men's blood could not have the sweetness of drinking, consisting as it did of the horror of death set before him. But if you wish to look more deeply and to examine the mystery within: David thirsted not for water from the cistern that is in Bethlehem, but in spirit he foresaw Christ, who would spring from the Virgin. He wished, therefore, to drink not the water of the stream, but the draught of spiritual grace — that is, he thirsted not for the element of waters, but for the blood of Christ.
In short, he did not drink the water offered, but poured it out to the Lord, signifying that he thirsted for the sacrifice of Christ, not for the stream of nature — that sacrifice in which there should be the remission of sins; that he thirsted for that eternal fountain, which was not sought at the peril of others, but which would drive away the perils of others. Shall we then not believe that by so many and so wondrous works the blood of one man was covered? Rightly the voice of the blood of righteous Abel cried to the Lord, because impious Cain was covered by no good works, because he was a parricide, because he did not confess his crime but rather denied it. But David indeed had slain a man by no means guilty, yet he had slain him not impelled by zeal for cruelty, but to overshadow his shame and cover the disgrace of his concupiscence.
I do not dare to say that he was overwhelmed by the force of the crime — for he was not overwhelmed who knew how he might raise himself from that ruin of sin — yet I do say that he was bent by the force of temptation. For he had said above: 'Prove me, O Lord, and try me; burn my reins and my heart,' and elsewhere: 'But I said in my abundance, I shall not be moved forever,' and: 'You have tested me with fire, and no iniquity has been found in me.' The Lord willed that he should be subject to temptation, lest he should arrogate to himself anything above man; for strength is made perfect in weakness. For he did not act with a bloody affection:
nothing less can be ascribed to the holy prophet, who, even as he was departing from life, with his last words charged his son Solomon to take away from himself the innocent blood which Joab, the commander of his army, had shed — when Abner, while he was treating concerning the entering of an alliance, fell, beset by the treacheries of a leader, albeit of the opposing battle-line. Him he wept, and walking behind his bier, having laid aside the insignia of his power, he saw to the rites of the funeral. By which deed he taught that good faith promised is to be kept even toward adversaries, and that valor is to be honored even in an enemy. Did he not, with the inheritance of so gentle a piety, also wipe away the blemish of this error?
How illustrious too was it that, when three conditions were offered him to choose whichever he would, when by numbering the people he had incurred offense — when it was set before him whether he would have famine come upon the land for three years, or flee for three months from the face of his pursuing enemies, or have death come upon the land for three days — he chose the third, because he would rather commit himself to the power of the Lord than of men; for the Lord, swiftly moved to mercy, would pardon. And so he says: 'I am in great straits in these three things, but rather let me fall into the hand of the Lord, for His mercy is very great, than fall into the hands of men.' By this humility, prudence, and meekness he brought it about — to use the words of Scripture — that the Lord had repentance of His own commotion.
In short, it is thus written that 'the Lord had repentance over the calamity.' How truly admirable too was it that he offered himself to the angel who was smiting the people, saying: 'This flock, what has it done? Let your hand be against me and against my father's house!' By which deed he was straightway judged worthy of the sacrifice, who had been esteemed unworthy of acquittal. Nor is it any wonder if by such an offering of himself for the people he obtained pardon of his own sin, since Moses too, by offering himself to the Lord for the error of the people, even blotted out the sins of the people. Has he then covered his sins or not? But who would deny this, since this very prophet has taught that iniquities are remitted, sins are covered, are not imputed by the Lord? That his sin was remitted to him he himself taught, as it is written:
'I acknowledge my transgression, and I have not hidden my injustice. I said: I will declare against myself my injustice to the Lord, and You forgave the impiety of my heart.' If he said 'I will declare,' and merited pardon before he declared it, how much more, when he declared concerning himself, saying: 'My iniquity I acknowledge,' was every sin remitted to him? Although specially concerning this Nathan the prophet too answered: 'And the Lord has put away your sin.' Therefore he both merited the remission of his iniquity and covered it with charity, and covered his sins, and covered them with good works. Nor was the sin imputed to him, because there was in him no guile of malice, but a lapse of error; and then because it was not the heat of wickedness, but the shadow of a mystery.
And yet he confessed his transgression, he acknowledged his iniquity, he saw the laver, and he both saw and believed. He loved much, so that by his exceeding charity he might cover anyone's error. But now let him defend himself; for he wrote the fiftieth psalm to that history. And though he subjoined the history of his former deeds — as concerning the betrayal of Doeg the Syrian, whose title is in the fifty-first psalm, and of the Ziphites, which seems to be comprised in the title of the fifty-third psalm — he set before them this history which is later, since Doeg betrayed him, and the Ziphites likewise, before the prophet David received the kingdom, seeing that, fleeing King Saul, he was still wandering an exile through various hidden places; whereas Bathsheba he took when he was already reigning.
Why then does the order of the psalms not correspond to the order of the deeds? Because he wished not so much the order to suit the order as the mystery to suit the deeds, and therefore he wished to fit the number of remission to this history. For the number fifty is the number of remission, as the Lord Himself taught us in the Gospel, saying: 'A certain moneylender had two debtors. One owed five hundred denarii, the other fifty. When they had nothing wherewith to pay, he forgave them both. Which of them then loves him more?' And you have in the Law that the recurring number of fifty years is called the Jubilee, a most celebrated return, in which debts are voided, the liberties of the Hebrews are confirmed, the restorations of possessions are made.
This number we joyfully celebrate after the Lord's passion, when the debt of all our guilt has been remitted and the bond cancelled, free from every tie; and we receive the grace of the Holy Spirit coming upon us: on the day of Pentecost, while fasting is suspended, praise is uttered to God, the Alleluia is sung. In short, the father too of that girl, who through the violence of intercourse had suffered while betrothed to no one, receives fifty silver double-drachmas, and she herself shall remain in wedlock. By this number, therefore, even vices are turned into grace. Great then is the psalm, by which we are taught how penance is to be done: 'Have mercy on me,' he says, 'O Lord, according to Your great mercy. And according to the multitude of Your compassions blot out my iniquity.'
'Wash me thoroughly from my injustice, and cleanse me from my transgression. For I acknowledge my iniquity, and my transgression is ever before me. Against You only have I sinned, and done evil before You, that You may be justified in Your words, and may overcome when You are judged. For behold, I was conceived in iniquities, and in transgressions did my mother bring me forth.' Who of us, even if he confess his transgression, would not think it ought rather to be touched upon lightly than to be repeated? Who would repeat it a second or a third time? See in how many verses so great a prophet sounds forth his sin, how no verse is without the confession of his transgression.
He heaped together all his iniquities at once, joining injustice to them by his confession, coupling his transgressions to his sins, and by often repeating them he rightly begs for great mercy; and not for great mercy only, but also for a multitude of compassions. What sin, then, would such lamentation not wash away, what guilt would a prayer of this kind not cleanse? He, for a single sin, beseeches a multitude of compassions; we, for many sins, scarcely believe that his mercy is to be implored even once. We read, moreover, that by his great power and his exalted arm he delivered his people out of the land of Egypt, when he led them across the Red Sea, in which there was a figure of baptism.
If, then, there was great power in the figure of the sacraments, how much greater is the mercy in their reality. Rightly too is a multitude of compassions sought there, where there is a multitude of sinners. 「Wash me thoroughly from my injustice, and cleanse me from my sin.」 He asks not so much to be washed more often as more fully, that he may rinse away the filth he has contracted. He knew that according to the Law there were indeed very many aids to cleansing, but none full and perfect. To that perfect thing, therefore, by which all righteousness is fulfilled — which is the sacrament of baptism — he hastens with all his intent, as the Lord Jesus himself teaches. For when he had come to John, the Baptist said: 「I ought to be baptized by you, and do you come to me?」 The Lord answered: 「Permit it for now;
for thus it becomes us to fulfill all righteousness.」 But after Christ was baptized, and the Holy Spirit descended upon him as a dove, and the Father from heaven set his seal upon the Son, all righteousness was fulfilled. Therefore the prophet says: 「Wash me thoroughly from my injustice;」 for great squalor and a stain that is not slight is taken away not by a little, but by much washing. But if anyone wishes to understand it otherwise, he may shape his understanding thus: the divine word cleanses, our confession cleanses — the one while it is heard, the other while it is uttered; good thought cleanses, honorable action cleanses, and likewise the practice of good conduct. Cleansed by these, each one more easily draws in and, as it were, seizes into himself the splendor of spiritual grace.
In short, the precious dye does not gleam at once from a single dipping of the fleece; but first the fleece is steeped in a common juice, then by various other juices its natural appearance is repeatedly rinsed out and often changed with a different color, and so afterward the staining of a fuller dipping, as it were, is applied, that the truer and more perfect brilliance of purple may glow red. As therefore there is a great quantity of murex-shells in the dyeing of purple, so in the laver of regeneration there is a multitude of heavenly compassions, that iniquity may be blotted out. And so he who is washed thoroughly is cleansed from injustice and from sin, and lays aside a certain ingrained habit of sinning bred by his pursuits and ways, and forgets its character.
And he is well washed from injustice or iniquity, which is the greater, and cleansed from sin, which is the lesser. And therefore he added: 「Because I acknowledge my iniquity, and my sin is ever before me.」 It is no small thing that each one should acknowledge his own sin. And therefore he said above also: 「Who shall understand his faults?」 — that is, who is so great as to understand them? Just as that other passage: 「Who shall dwell in your tabernacle, or who shall ascend the mountain of the Lord?」 Not indeed no one, but few; for he who can acknowledge can turn aside, can choose what he should follow.
Very many glory in their downfalls and think those things to be praiseworthy which are criminal — if a man has defiled another's bed and stormed the affection of a chaste woman, if by some fraud he has altered the resolve of a widow; another thinks it to be a mark of manliness to live by the murder of a man, by the ambushes of robbery, and by plunder; some judge it to be wisdom to circumvent and deceive. Of these none can say: 「Because I acknowledge my iniquity,」 but only he who can grieve for what he has done, condemn what he has transgressed, whom his own vices prick. Whence the prophet also says: 「The things which you say in your hearts, on your beds be pricked with remorse.」
Most horses, when they have fallen, are wont to toss themselves about, and those whom the fall did not injure are weakened and broken by their own thrashing. Others — such as the nature of Greek horses is said to be — when they have either been thrown in the chariot-race or fallen by chance, are by no means wont to move themselves, but keep a certain discipline of quiet and patience. If the fall did them no harm, their stillness profits them; certainly the mishap is not aggravated. Are not those to be reckoned worse than dumb animals who toss themselves about in their own disgraces and think it a badge of manliness where there has been the downfall of a crime? Therefore it is said as to a dumb beast: 「You have sinned, be still.」 Whence he beautifully added: 「And my sin is ever before me.」
For the fool delights in his own errors and, by overshadowing old sins with new ones, thinks himself to be helped, and therefore exults in his crime. But the wise man judges his transgression to be against himself, and reckons that the downfalls of his own faults stand against him like hostile battle-lines opposing him. Whatever resounds, whatever rebukes, his own fault ever meets him; whatever is said or read, he thinks it said against himself; whatever anyone points at, he thinks himself marked out by the nod, by the eyes. If he feasts, if he reflects, if he prays and entreats, his own error is ever before his eyes, and at every moment his fault beats upon his conscience and lets him neither rest nor forget. Like a stern censor it harasses him with perpetual terror.
All things therefore are adverse to him who is displeased with himself, who is his own accuser, his own witness, and finds no place to flee, since he himself drives and goads himself on. But this belongs to a good mind — to feel the wound of sin. For those who are without pain do not feel the bitterness of the wound, which is the mark of an incurable sickness; but those who are pricked by some pain, just as they do not lack the sensation of pain, so neither do they lack progress toward health. For where there is the sensation of pain, there too is the sensation of life; for to feel is the mark of vital vigor and of a gift.
Whence he too who does not acknowledge his error is mad, raves, is foolish; but he who acknowledges surely comes to his senses, does not reject the remedies of health, but restrains himself, repents of his fault, ever thinks upon it, and by thinking condemns himself. But the righteous man, at the beginning of his speech, is the accuser of himself. He who accuses himself is righteous; he who is righteous is sober, is sound. The righteous man knows not how to favor himself, knows not how to bend the rigor of judgment even concerning himself, shudders at the recollection of his own downfall, blushes at the error he has committed, and dreads, fears, and recoils from all memory of it;
he judges himself a heavy burden to himself, flees from himself as judge, and dares not entrust himself to himself, because he thinks none more grievous to himself than him from whom he cannot lie hidden, whom he cannot deceive, whom he finds no way to flee or avoid — unless he deny himself and take up the cross of the Lord. Great is the power of a guilty conscience, great are its torments. Eve and Adam were afraid, and when they heard the voice of the Lord walking in paradise, they longed to hide themselves, though no one sought them. Cain too was afraid, lest anyone whatsoever who found him should kill him. Thus he bore the sentence against himself, that he was worthy that no one should pardon him. Whence he well says: 「And my sin is ever before me,」 that is:
without any interval the recollection and the very image of my error assails me. Consider how it confounds us when we have transgressed in anything, how it assails our eyes, how it ever recurs to memory. He who is ashamed of what he has committed knows not afterward to commit anything of the kind, at which he might similarly blush. Now iniquity precedes, sin follows. Iniquity is the root, but the fruit of the root is the fault. Whence iniquity seems to be referred to the depravity of the mind, sin to the lapse of the body. Iniquity is the graver, as it were the matter of sins; sin is the lighter. In short, iniquity is remitted through the laver, sin is covered by good deeds and, as it were, overshadowed by other works. Whence this same prophet well says above:
「Blessed are they whose iniquities are forgiven, and whose sins are covered.」 For love hides error and covers a multitude of sins. Much love also remits even sins themselves, as it is written of the woman who poured ointment upon the Lord: 「Her many sins are forgiven, because she loved much.」 There are also those who take it that the first little verse is about the laver, the second about repentance. By which grace Peter too, who had previously been baptized, is questioned, after he was seen to have denied the Lord: 「Simon, son of John, do you love me?」 He says to him: 「Yes indeed, Lord, you know that I love you.」 And again he is questioned: 「Simon, son of John, do you love me?」 And again he answers: 「You know that I love you.」 And a third time he is questioned:
「Simon, son of John, do you love me?」 And he was grieved because he said to him a third time: 「Do you love me?」 and he says to him: 「Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.」 And it was said to him three times over: 「Feed my sheep; follow me,」 as to one who had covered his sin by exceeding love. Nor is it idly that after the confession of exceeding love he is bidden to rule the people — he who even when troubled had not lost the knowledge of how to rule himself. This we have said concerning the grace of love, in that it covers sin. In short, some have said that the threefold questioning about love was made for this reason: because there had been a threefold denial, so that the threefold profession of love, so often repeated, might blot out the downfall of the threefold denial. There follows: 「Against you only have I sinned.」
He was indeed a king, himself bound by no laws, because kings are free from the bonds of transgressions; for they are not summoned to punishment by any laws, being safe under the power of their sovereignty. Against man therefore he had not sinned, to whom he was not bound as liable. But although safe in his sovereignty, yet by devotion and faith he was subject to God, and knowing himself to be subject to his law, he could not deny his sin, but like a guilty man confessed it with bitterness — he who knew that he was held by greater bonds, because he owed greater things, since more is required of him to whom more has been entrusted. We may also understand it thus: 「Who judges me, since all are under sin?」 In short, the Lord says concerning that adulteress: 「He who is without sin, let him first cast a stone at her.」
And no one stoned her. This therefore the prophet says: 「Against you only have I sinned,」 you who alone are without sin. But he who is liable to sin cannot judge her as a sinner. For every man is inexcusable who condemns in another the very things which he himself does; for in that wherein he judges another, he passes sentence on himself. 「Against you,」 he says, 「have I sinned, and done evil before you, that you may be justified in your words and overcome when you are judged.」 「Against you have I sinned,」 you who provoked me to the pursuits of virtue, who instructed me in your law. 「Against you only have I sinned,」 you whom alone the hidden things of thoughts and the secrets of the mind do not deceive. 「And done evil before you,」 you whom holiness alone befits. We shun the testimony of man, yet in your sight we commit things that are unworthy.
It is an affront to man to behold disgraceful deeds; we know that God is the judge of all, and with him himself as witness we sin; and yet in these things the Lord our God is the more justified, because our injustice commends God's justice, and our lie celebrates the truth of God. For let God be true, but every man a liar. 「That you may be justified in your words.」 The words of God are full of truth and of justice, and therefore whatever the Lord has spoken concerning human frailty is true, because their heart is bent toward wickedness, inclines toward fraud.
And because he defined it in this, that there is no man who does not sin — for all have turned aside and become unprofitable — therefore he overcomes when he is judged, since by the downfall of all he proved whatever things he judged concerning our deceitfulness. Therefore if we say that we have committed iniquity, we justify God in his words; but if we say that we have not sinned, we make God a liar; yet it is impossible for him to lie. It is therefore manifest that we are all under sin. How great a crime, then, that a man should deny himself to be a sinner, since, as far as in him lies, he seems to convict and refute the lie of the most high God — who is so moderate and patient that he overcomes when he is judged. For he comes to judgment: God says:
「My people, what have I done to you, or in what have I grieved you, or in what have I been troublesome to you? Because I brought you up out of the land of Egypt, and delivered you from the house of bondage, and sent before your face Moses and Aaron and Miriam. My people, remember what Balak devised against you.」 He sets before your sight his benefits one by one, that you may be judged, as it were, concerning those things which you ought to have kept, so that you may the more become guilty, you who could not stand by the divine benefits. 「What have I done,」 he says, 「to you?」 As though he sets himself up as the accused and you as judge. 「Or in what have I grieved you?」 He does not deny the charge of an offended countenance, if you have been grieved with God as the author. 「Or in what have I been troublesome to you?」 He confesses the affront of an interruption, if it was reckoned too troublesome:
He adds his benefits, for whose sake the one who was reckoned ungrateful was not ashamed. In this case too consider how the Lord offered himself to David himself to be judged, that he might overcome; for Nathan says: 「Thus says the Lord God of Israel: I anointed you king over Israel, and I delivered you from the hand of Saul, and gave you all that belonged to your master, and gave his wives into your bosom, and gave you the house of Israel itself, and, if these are few, I will add to you. And why have you held the Lord as nothing, that you should act wickedly in his sight?」 Confronted by the recollection of these things, when he saw that he was the inferior when he is judged, he says: 「I have sinned against the Lord.」 Thus he justified the Lord, who did not dare to deny his sin. We may also understand it thus:
He justifies the Lord who confesses his sin. In short, in the Gospel you have it that the publicans justified God, being baptized with the baptism of John. But John the Baptist administered a baptism of repentance. And he who performs repentance does not deny his transgressions. Therefore, because David always had his sin before himself, he surely did not deny what he also blushed at, did not deny what he also acknowledged. And by not denying, he surely bore the repentance of the error he had committed, and so by confessing his transgression he justified the Lord and was himself justified by the Lord. For the Lord is justified when his justice is proclaimed and pardon is sought from him. At once both he himself justifies the one confessing and is justified in his words, as it is written: