Sayings of the Desert Fathers 1 part 1/2

Concerning Abba Macarius the Egyptian

When I was younger and was dwelling in a cell in Egypt, they seized me and made me a cleric in the village;

and not wishing to accept it, I fled to another place.

And a devout layman came to me, and used to take my handwork and minister to me;

Now it happened that through temptation a certain virgin in the village fell into sin;

and when she had conceived, she was asked who had done this; and she said:

And they came out and seized me in the village, and hung soot-blackened pots and the handles of jars about my neck, and led me in procession through the village from street to street, beating me and saying:

This monk has defiled our virgin; take him, take him!

And they beat me almost to death.

But one of the elders came and said:

How long will you beat this foreign monk? And the one who ministered to me followed behind me, ashamed;

for they were heaping much abuse upon him, saying:

Behold the hermit to whom you bore witness—what has he done? And her parents said:

We will not release him until he gives a surety to maintain her.

And I said to my attendant:

And going away to my cell, I gave him all the baskets I had, saying:

Sell these and give my wife food to eat.

And I said to my thought:

Macarius, behold, you have found yourself a wife;

you must work a little more, so that you may feed her.

And I worked night and day, and sent it to her.

And when the time came for the wretched woman to give birth, she remained many days in travail, and could not bring forth.

What is this? And she said:

Because I slandered the hermit, and lying, laid the blame on him;

and he has nothing to do with it, but it was so-and-so, the young man.

And the one who ministered to me came rejoicing, saying that that virgin had not been able to give birth until she confessed, saying that the hermit had nothing to do with it, but that she had lied against him;

and behold, the whole village wishes to come here with honor, and to do penance to you.

But when I heard these things, lest people should trouble me, I rose up and fled here to Scetis.

This is the beginning of the cause for which I came here.

Macarius the Egyptian once came from Scetis to the mountain of Nitria, for the offering of Abba Pambo;

and the elders said to him:

Speak a word to the brothers, father.

I have not yet become a monk, but I have seen monks;

for once when I was sitting in my cell at Scetis, my thoughts troubled me, saying:

Go out into the desert, and see what you behold there.

And I remained fighting with the thought for five years, saying, lest it be from demons.

And as the thought persisted, I went out into the desert;

and I found there a lake of waters, and an island in the midst of it;

and the beasts of the desert came to drink from it;

and I saw in their midst two naked men;

and my body trembled with fear;

for I thought that they were spirits.

But when they saw me afraid, they spoke to me:

Where are you from, and how did you come into this desert? And I said:

And there was an agreement between us, and we came out here;

and the one is an Egyptian, and the other is a Libyan.

And they also questioned me, saying:

How is the world? And whether the water comes in its season, and whether the world has its abundance? And I said to them:

How can I become a monk? And they said to me:

Unless one renounces all the things of the world, he cannot become a monk.

I am weak, and I cannot be as you are;

If you cannot be as we are, sit in your cell and weep for your sins.

When winter comes, do you not shiver? And when the heat comes, are not your bodies burned? And they said:

God has made for us this dispensation;

and we neither shiver in winter, nor does the heat in summer harm us.

Therefore I told you that I have not yet become a monk, but I have seen monks.

Forgive me, brothers.

Abba Macarius, when he dwelt in the great desert,

he was alone there as a hermit, and further down there was another desert with more brothers.

Now the elder was watching the road, and he sees Satan coming up in the form of a man, passing by him;

and he appeared as one wearing a linen tunic full of holes;

and at each hole there hung a little flask.

And the great elder said to him:

Where are you going? And he said to him:

I am going to remind the brothers.

And what are these little flasks for? And he said:

I am carrying treats for the brothers.

If one does not please someone, I bring another;

and if not even that, I give another;

and altogether at least one of them will please him.

And the elder remained watching the roads until that one came back again.

And when the elder saw him, he said to him:

How can I be saved? The elder says to him:

For they all became fierce toward me, and not one of them puts up with me.

So have you no friend there? And he answered:

Yes, I have one monk there as a friend, and he at least obeys me;

and when he sees me, he turns about like a weathervane.

And what is the brother called? And he says:

And having said these things he went away; and Abba Macarius rose up and went off to the desert further down, and the brothers, hearing of it, took palm branches and went out to meet him.

And then each one was making preparations, thinking that the elder would lodge with him.

But he was seeking who it was that was called Theopemptus on the mountain.

And having found him, he entered into his cell.

And Theopemptus received him with joy.

And when he began to be alone with him, the elder says:

How are things with you, brother? And he said:

Do the thoughts not war against you? And he said:

Behold, how many years I have practiced asceticism, and am honored by all, and yet the spirit of fornication troubles me, an old man.

Theopemptus answered and said:

And the elder pretended that other thoughts also warred against him, until he made him confess;

How do you fast? And he says to him:

Fast until evening, and practice asceticism;

and memorize the Gospel and the other Scriptures;

and if a thought rises up in you, never look downward, but always upward;

and at once the Lord will help you.

And having instructed the brother, the elder went out to his own desert.

And watching again, he sees that demon, and says to him:

Where are you going again? And he says:

To remind the brothers; and he went off.

And when he came back again, the holy one says to him:

How are the brothers? And he says:

And the greater evil is that even the one whom I had as a friend, who obeyed me—even he, I know not from where, has turned away, and no longer obeys me, but has become fiercer than all of them;

and I have sworn no longer to set foot in that place, except after a time.

And having said this he went away, leaving the elder;

and the holy one entered into his cell.

Abba Macarius the Great went to visit Abba Antony on the mountain, and when he knocked at the door, Antony came out to him and said to him:

And having shut the door, he went in and left him.

And seeing his patient endurance, he opened to him.

And jesting kindly with him, he said:

For a long time I have desired to see you, hearing the things concerning you.

And having shown him hospitality, he gave him rest;

and when evening came, Abba Antony soaked some palm-fronds for himself;

and Abba Macarius says to him:

Permit me also to soak some for myself.

And having made a large bundle, he soaked it;

and sitting from evening, talking about the salvation of souls, they wove;

and the cord went down through the window into the cave.

And blessed Antony, going in early in the morning, saw the great quantity of Abba Macarius's cord, and said:

Great power comes forth from these hands.

Abba Macarius spoke to the brothers about the desolation of Scetis:

When you see a cell being built near the marsh, know that its desolation is near;

when you see trees, it is at the doors;

and when you see children, take up your sheepskins and depart.

He said again, wishing to comfort the brothers:

A demon-possessed child came here with his mother, and he said to his mother:

Get up, old woman, let us go away from here.

And the child said to her:

And I marveled at the wickedness of the demon, how he wished to drive them away.

When I was at Scetis with Macarius, we went up to harvest with him, seven persons in all.

And behold, a certain widow was gleaning behind us, and she did not cease weeping;

So the elder called the owner of the field and said to him:

What is the matter with this old woman, that she is always weeping? He says to him:

Because her husband held a certain deposit in trust, and died suddenly, and did not say where he put it;

and the owner of the deposit wishes to take her and her children as slaves.

Tell her to come to us, where we rest during the heat.

And when the woman came, the elder said to her:

Why do you weep so continually? And she said:

My husband died having received a certain deposit in trust, and dying did not say where he put it.

And the elder said to her:

Come, show me where you laid him.

And taking the brothers with him, he went out with her;

and when they came to the place, the elder said to her:

Withdraw to your house.

And when they had prayed, the elder called to the dead man, saying:

So-and-so, where did you put the deposit belonging to another? And he answered and said:

It is hidden in my house under the foot of the bed.

Let me sleep again until the day of resurrection.

And when the brothers saw it, they fell at his feet from fear.

And the elder said to them:

But it was for the sake of the widow and the orphans that God did this thing;

and this is the great thing, that God wishes the soul to be without sin;

and whatever it asks, it receives.

And going, he announced to the widow where the deposit lay;

and she, taking it, gave it to its owner, and freed her children.

And all who heard it glorified God.

Abba Peter said concerning holy Macarius, that once coming to a certain hermit, and finding him ill, he asked what he would like to eat, since there was nothing in his cell.

And when that man said, a cake, the brave man did not hesitate to go to the city of Alexandria and give it to the sick man;

and the marvelous thing was that it became known to no one.

He said again, that while Abba Macarius lived in guilelessness toward all the brothers, some said to him:

Why do you make yourself like this? And he said:

Twelve years I served my Lord, that he might grant me this gift, and you all counsel me to lay it aside? They said concerning Abba Macarius, that if he had leisure with the brothers, he set himself a rule:

that if wine were found, drink it for the brothers' sake, but in exchange for one cup of wine, go one day without drinking water;

and the elder received it with joy, that he might torment himself;

but the disciple, knowing the matter, said to the brothers:

For the Lord's sake, do not give it to him;

otherwise, he is going to mortify himself in his cell.

And the brothers, learning this, no longer offered it to him.

Once when Abba Macarius was passing from the marsh to his cell, carrying palm-fronds, behold, the devil met him along the way with a sickle.

And when he wished to strike him, he was not able.

Great is the violence from you, Macarius, for I have no power against you;

for behold, whatever you do, I also do;

there is one thing only in which you surpass me.

Abba Macarius says to him:

and because of this I have no power against you.

Some of the fathers asked Abba Macarius the Egyptian, saying:

How is it that whether you eat or whether you fast, your body is dry? And the elder says to them:

The stick that turns the burning kindling is itself wholly consumed by the fire;

so too, if a man purifies his mind in the fear of God, the very fear of God consumes his body.

Abba Macarius once went up from Scetis to Terenuthis;

and he went into a temple to sleep;

and there were there old tombs of the pagan Greeks;

and taking one, he placed it under his head as a pillow;

Now the demons, seeing his boldness, were filled with envy;

and wishing to frighten him, they called out as if it were a woman's name, saying:

So-and-so, come with us to the bath;

And another demon answered from beneath him, as if from among the dead, saying:

I have a stranger lying on top of me, and I cannot come.

But the elder was not frightened, but boldly struck the corpse, saying:

Get up, go off into the darkness, if you can.

And when the demons heard this, they cried out with a loud voice, saying:

and they fled away in shame.

They said concerning Abba Macarius the Egyptian, that going up from Scetis, and carrying baskets, growing weary, he sat down;

O God, you know that I have no strength;

and at once he was found at the river.

There was a certain man in Egypt who had a paralyzed son;

and he brought him to the cell of Abba Macarius;

and leaving him weeping at the door, he withdrew far off.

So the elder, leaning out, saw the child, and says to him:

Who brought you here? And he says:

My father threw me down here, and went away.

And at once, being healed, he rose up, and overtook his father;

and so they went off to their home.

Abba Macarius the Great used to say to the brothers at Scetis, as he dismissed the church:

And one of the elders said to him:

Where can we flee, beyond this desert? And he put his finger to his mouth, saying:

And he entered into his own cell, and shut the door, and sat down.

The same Abba Macarius said:

If, in rebuking someone, you are moved to anger, you are gratifying your own passion;

for you will not lose yourself in order to save others.

The same Abba Macarius, while he was in Egypt, found a man who had a pack-animal and was plundering his goods;

and he himself, standing by the plunderer as if a stranger, helped load the animal, and with great calm sent him off, saying that we brought nothing into the world, and clearly we can carry nothing out;

as he himself willed, so it also came to pass.

Blessed be the Lord in all things.

Some asked Abba Macarius, saying:

How ought we to pray? The elder says to them:

There is no need to use vain repetitions, but to stretch out the hands and say:

Lord, as you will and as you know, have mercy;

and if a battle presses upon you,

and he himself knows what is profitable, and deals mercifully with us.

If contempt has become to you as praise, and poverty as wealth, and want as abundance, you will not die;

for it is impossible that one who believes rightly and labors in godliness should fall into the uncleanness of the passions and the deception of demons.

They said that two brothers fell into sin at Scetis;

and Abba Macarius the Citizen separated them;

and some came and told Abba Macarius the Great, the Egyptian:

The brothers are not the ones separated, but Macarius is the one separated;

Abba Macarius heard that he had been separated by the elder, and fled to the marsh.

So Abba Macarius the Great went out;

and he finds him being stung by the mosquitoes;

You separated the brothers, and behold, they were about to withdraw to the village;

but I separated you, and you, like a good virgin, fled here into the inner chamber.

I called the brothers, and learned from them, and I said:

See then, you also, brother, lest you have been mocked by demons, for you have seen nothing;

but do penance for your fault.

If you wish, give me penance.

And the elder, seeing his humility, said:

Go, and fast three weeks, eating once a week;

for this was always his own practice, to fast the weeks.

Abba Moses said to Abba Macarius at Scetis:

I wish to be in stillness, and the brothers will not let me.

And Abba Macarius says to him:

I see that your nature is tender, and you cannot turn a brother away;

but if you wish to be in stillness, go into the inner desert, to Petra, and there you will have stillness.

And he did this, and found rest.

A brother went to visit Abba Macarius the Egyptian, and says to him:

Abba, tell me a word, how I may be saved.

Go to the tomb, and revile the dead.

So the brother went off and reviled and threw stones;

and coming back, he reported to the elder.

Did they say nothing to you? And he said:

Go again tomorrow, and praise them.

So the brother went off and praised them, saying:

Apostles, saints, and righteous ones!

And he came to the elder, and said to him:

Did they not answer you anything? The brother said:

You see how much you dishonored them, and they answered nothing, and how much you praised them, and they said nothing to you.

So you too, if you wish to be saved, become dead;

reckon neither the wrong men do, nor their praise, like the dead.

Once when Abba Macarius was passing through Egypt with some brothers, he heard a child saying to his mother:

Mother, a certain rich man loves me, and I hate him;

and a poor man hates me, and I love him.

And when Abba Macarius heard it, he marveled.

And the brothers say to him:

What is this saying, father, that you marveled? And the elder says to them:

Truly our Lord is rich and loves us, and we do not wish to hear him;

but our enemy the devil is poor and hates us, and we love his uncleanness.

Abba Poemen entreated him with many tears, saying:

And the elder answered and said to him:

The thing you seek has now departed from the monks.

Abba Macarius once went to visit Abba Antony;

and having spoken with him, he returned to Scetis;

and the fathers came out to meet him;

and as they were talking, the elder said to them:

I said to Abba Antony that we have no eucharistic offering in our place.

And the fathers began to talk about other things, and did not ask further to learn the answer from the elder, nor did the elder tell them;

When a matter is of profit to them, they constrain themselves to begin the word;

but if they are not constrained by the brothers, they no longer speak the word;

lest they be found speaking without being asked, and it be reckoned as idle talk.

Abba Isaiah asked Abba Macarius, saying:

Abba Isaiah said to him:

What is it to flee from men? And the elder said to him:

It is to sit in your cell and weep for your sins.

Abba Paphnutius, the disciple of Abba Macarius, said that I entreated my father, saying:

Do not harm anyone, nor condemn anyone;

do not sleep in the cell of a brother who has a bad reputation.

Some brothers once visited Abba Macarius at Scetis, and found nothing in his cell except foul water, and they said to him:

Abba, come up to the village, and we will give you rest.

Do you know, brothers, the bakery of so-and-so in the village? And they say to him:

Do you also know the field of so-and-so where the river beats? They say to him:

So then, when I wish, I have no need of you, but I provide for myself.

They said concerning Abba Macarius, that if a brother approached him with fear as a holy and great elder, he would say nothing to him;

but if one of the brothers said to him, as if despising him:

Abba, were you not, when you were a camel-driver and used to steal nitre and sell it, beaten by the guards? If anyone said this to him, he would talk with him with joy, about whatever he asked him.

They said concerning Abba Macarius the Great, that he became, as it is written, a god upon earth;

for just as God shelters the world, so Abba Macarius became one who sheltered faults, seeing the things he saw as though not seeing, and hearing the things he heard as though not hearing.

Once when I was sitting at Scetis, two young strangers came down there;

and the one had a beard, and the other was just beginning to grow a beard.

And they came to me, saying:

Where is the cell of Abba Macarius? And I said:

What do you want with him? And they say:

Hearing the things about him and about Scetis, we came to see him.

And they made a prostration, saying:

But seeing that they were delicate and as if from a wealthy background, I said to them:

If we cannot settle here, let us go elsewhere.

Why do I press them, so that they take offense? The hardship will make them flee of their own accord.

Come, make yourselves a cell, if you are able.

Show us a place, and we will make it.

The old man gave them an axe and a small basket full of bread-morsels and salt.

The old man also showed them a hard rock, saying:

Quarry here, and bring yourselves wood from the marsh, and when you have roofed it over, settle down.

Now I supposed, he said, that on account of the hardship they would withdraw.

They asked me what they should work at here.

So I take palm-leaves from the marsh, and show them the beginning of the cord, and how it must be plaited, and I said:

Make baskets, and give them to the guards, and they will bring you bread-morsels.

And they did everything with patient endurance, all that I told them.

And they did not come to me for three years.

And I remained battling with my thoughts, saying:

What then is their practice, that they have not come to ask about a thought? Those from far away come to me;

yet these who are near have not come, nor have they gone to others;

except only into the church, in silence, to receive the offering.

Rising up after the week, I went off to them to see how they were faring;

and when I knocked they opened, and greeted me in silence;

and having made a prayer I sat down.

The elder one, signalling to the younger to go out, sat plaiting the cord, saying nothing.

And at the ninth hour he gave a signal, and the younger came and made a little boiled food, and laid the table, at the elder's nod;

and he set on it three small loaves, and stood in silence.

And he brought the little flask, and we drank.

And when evening came, they said to me:

And they set out for me a small mat on one side, and for themselves on the other side, in the corner.

And they took off their girdles and their shoulder-cloaks, and laid themselves down together on the mat in front of me.

And when they had laid themselves down, I prayed to God that He would reveal to me their practice.

And the roof was opened, and there came light as of day;

but they did not perceive the light.

And when they thought that I was asleep, the elder nudges the younger in the side, and they rise, and gird themselves, and stretch out their hands toward heaven.

But they did not perceive me;

and I saw the demons coming like flies upon the younger;

and some came to settle on his mouth, others on his eyes.

And I saw an angel of the Lord holding a sword of fire, encircling him as with a rampart and driving the demons away from him.

But to the elder they could not draw near.

And when toward dawn they laid themselves down;

I too made as if I had just awoken, and they did likewise.

The elder said to me only this word:

Do you wish that we chant the twelve psalms? I said:

And the younger chants five psalms of six verses each, and one Alleluia.

And at each verse a lamp of fire came forth from his mouth, and went up to heaven.

Likewise also the elder, when he opened his mouth chanting, what was like a rope of fire came forth, and reached up to heaven.

And I too said a little from memory.

But they made a prostration in silence.

So I learned that the elder was perfect, but the enemy still warred against the younger.

And after a few days the elder brother fell asleep, and on the third day the younger.

And whenever some of the fathers visited Abba Macarius, he would take them into their cell, saying:

Come, see the martyrdom of the little strangers.

Once the elders of the mountain sent to Abba Macarius in Scetis, entreating him:

So that all the people may not be troubled to come to you, we beg you to come to us, that we may behold you before you depart to the Lord.

When he had arrived at the mountain, all the people gathered to him;

and the elders begged him to say a word to the brothers.

Let us weep, brothers, and let our eyes bring down tears, before we depart to where our tears will burn up our bodies.

And they all wept, and fell on their faces, and said:

On another occasion a demon stood over Abba Macarius with a knife, wishing to cut off his foot;

and being unable to, on account of his humility, it said to him:

Whatever you have, we also have;

in humility alone you surpass us, and prevail.

If we remember the evils brought upon us by men, we destroy the power of the remembrance of God;

but if we remember the evils of the demons, we shall be invulnerable.

Abba Paphnutius, the disciple of Abba Macarius, said that the old man used to relate: When I was a child, I was pasturing cattle with the other children;

and as they were running, one of them fell, and I took it and ate it.

And whenever I remember it, I sit and weep.

Abba Macarius said: As I was once walking in the desert, I found a skull of a dead man cast upon the ground;

and when I had stirred it with my palm-staff, the skull spoke to me;

Who are you? The skull answered me:

I was a high priest of the idols, and of the pagans who dwelt in this place;

but you are Macarius the Spirit-bearer;

whenever you have compassion on those in punishment, and pray for them, they receive a little comfort.

What is the comfort, and what is the punishment? He said to him:

As far as heaven is from the earth, so great is the fire beneath us, while we stand in the midst of the fire from feet to head;

and it is not possible for anyone to behold another face to face, but each one's face is fixed to the back of the other.

So when you pray for us, one of us partly sees the face of the other;

this is the comfort.

And weeping, the old man said:

Woe to the day on which man was born!

Is there any worse torment? The skull said to him:

There is a greater torment beneath us.

And who are there? The skull said to him:

We who did not know God yet receive a little mercy;

but those who knew God and denied Him are beneath us.

And the old man took the skull and buried it.

They used to say of Abba Macarius the Egyptian, that once he was going up from Scetis to the mountain of Nitria;

and as he drew near to the place, he said to his disciple:

And as he was going on ahead, the disciple meets a certain priest of the pagans;

and the brother shouted at him, crying out:

Hey, hey, demon, where are you running? But that man, turning around, gave him blows and left him half dead.

And taking up his staff he ran on;

and when he had gone a little forward, Abba Macarius, who was running, meets him;

May you be saved, may you be saved, weary one!

And marvelling, he came to him and said:

What good have you seen in me, that you greeted me? The old man said to him:

Do you not know that you are toiling in vain?

I too was pierced to the heart at your greeting;

and I learned that you belong to God's portion;

but another, a wicked monk, having met me, insulted me;

and I gave him blows unto death.

And the old man knew that it was his disciple.

And the priest, grasping his feet, said:

I will not let you go, unless you make me a monk.

And they came up to where the monk was, and lifted him up and carried him to the church of the mountain;

and seeing the priest with him, they were amazed;

and they made him a monk;

and many of the pagans became Christians through him.