Homilies on the Acts of the Apostles 45

And from Miletus he sent to Ephesus, and called to him the elders of the Church.

And when they had come to him, he said to them:

'Ye know, from the first day that I set foot in Asia, in what manner I was with you the whole time, serving the Lord with you with all humility of mind, and with many tears and trials which befell me by the plots of the Jews; how I kept back nothing that was profitable, that I did not declare it to you, and teach you publicly and from house to house, testifying both to Jews and to Greeks repentance toward God, and faith toward our Lord Jesus Christ.'

Observe him both hastening to sail past, and yet not overlooking them, but ordering everything well.

Having summoned the rulers, in their presence he recounts what has been said.

And it is worthy of admiration, how, falling into the necessity of saying some great things about himself, he tries to speak modestly.

For just as Samuel, when about to deliver over the rule to Saul, says in their presence:

'Have I taken aught from you? Ye are witnesses, and God also;'

and David, when disbelieved, says:

'I was in the fold shepherding my father's sheep;'

'and when the bear came, with my hands I drove it away;'

and Paul himself, likewise, says to the Corinthians;

And God Himself too does this very thing, not speaking about Himself without cause;

but whenever He is disbelieved, He also brings forward His benefits.

See then here also what he does;

first he brings forward their own testimony, that thou mayest not think the words to be boasting, and he calls his very hearers witnesses of what is said, as one who could never have lied in their presence.

This is the virtue of a teacher, when he has as witnesses of his own good deeds the very ones he has taught.

And the marvel is, that he continued doing this not for one day nor for a second, but for a multitude of years.

'For ye,' he says, 'know in what manner I was with you the whole time.'

He wishes therefore to exhort them, so as to bear nobly all things, both his own departure and the trials that are about to befall, just as indeed happened also in the case of Moses and Joshua.

And see what he added when he said:

'In what manner I was with you the whole time, serving the Lord with all humility of mind.'

See what most of all befits rulers;

'Hating,' he says, 'arrogance;'

which most of all is fitting for rulers, because of the necessity that they be lifted up to senselessness.

This is the foundation of good things, just as indeed Christ also said:

'Blessed are the poor in spirit.'

And he did not say simply 'humility of mind,' but, 'with all.'

For there are many kinds of humility of mind, and it is possible to see humility in word, in deed, toward rulers, toward those who are ruled.

Will ye that I tell you the modes of humility of mind? There are some who, toward the lowly being lowly, are yet toward the lofty lofty;

but this is not of humility of mind.

But there are again others who are not such, but toward both sorts of persons keep, according to the occasion, both the lowly and the lofty;

which is indeed most of all of humility of mind.

Being about therefore to teach them such things, that he might not seem to be puffed up, he first lays down a foundation, removing the suspicion.

'For if I have been with all humility of mind,' he says, 'it is not out of arrogance that I say what I say.'

'I was with you,' he says, 'serving the Lord,' showing them to be partakers of the good work.

Thus everywhere fellowship is a good thing.

He therefore makes the good deeds common, and sets down nothing as his own peculiar distinction.

'For what?' he says. 'Could he have been puffed up against God?' And indeed there are many who are puffed up against Him;

but this man was not puffed up even against his own disciples.

This is the good work of a teacher, to regulate the disciples from his own good deeds.

Then, 'the manliness,' he says, which too he cuts short.

'With many tears and trials which befell me by the plots of the Jews.'

Dost thou see that he grieves at what is happening? And here he seems also to show his sympathy;

for he suffered on behalf of those who were perishing, on behalf of the very ones who were doing these things;

since for those who came to him he also rejoiced;

for he was of that band which rejoiced, because they were counted worthy to be dishonored for His name.

'Now I rejoice in my sufferings for you;'

'For the momentary lightness of our affliction worketh out for us, more and more exceedingly, an eternal weight of glory.'

But he says these things in modesty.

And here he shows his manliness, and not so much his manliness as his endurance;

'I suffered ill, but with you;'

and the grievous thing was, that it was by the Jews.

Behold for me here the character of teaching;

he sets down both the love and the manliness.

By these things he shows at once both the ungrudging spirit and the unhesitating diligence.

And just as concealing certain things is of envy;

so telling all things is of folly.

For this reason he added, 'of the things that were profitable,' showing that 'I did not only speak, but also taught;'

not as merely discharging this duty as a formality, he says.

And that this is what he means, hear what follows:

displaying his long hardship, his great earnestness, and his patient endurance.

'Testifying to both Jews and Greeks.'

'Not to you only,' he says, 'but also to the Greeks.'

And this too, that even if we accomplish no benefit, we must still speak.

For to testify solemnly is just this—when we speak to those who pay no heed.

For to testify solemnly is, for the most part, this very thing.

'I call to witness,' says Moses, 'heaven and earth.'

And now Paul himself: 'Testifying to both Jews and Greeks repentance toward God.'

Why do you testify? So that they may take care for their manner of life;

so that they may repent and draw near to God.

For not even the Jews knew Him, both because they were ignorant of the Son, and because they had not the works, nor the faith that is toward the Lord Jesus.

'For what reason, then, do you say these things? For what reason do you call these to remembrance? What has happened? Have you any charge to bring?' First having shaken their mind, he then goes on:

'And now, behold, I go bound in the Spirit to Jerusalem, not knowing the things that shall befall me there;'

'save that the Holy Spirit testifies to me in every city, saying that bonds and afflictions await me.'

'But I make account of none of these things;'

'nor do I hold my life dear to myself, so that I may finish my course with joy, and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify the Gospel of the grace of God.'

Why does he say these things? To prepare them to be always ready for dangers both seen and unseen, and to obey the Spirit in all things.

He shows also that he is being led away to great things.

'Save that the Holy Spirit,' he says, 'testifies to me in every city, saying'—

In order to show that he goes willingly, and that you should not suppose it a bond or a necessity, he said 'In every city.'

Then he adds: 'I hold not my own life dear, so that I may finish my course with joy, and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus.'

Do you see that these were not the words of one lamenting, but of one bearing himself with moderation, instructing them, and suffering together with what was befalling them? He did not say, 'We are in anguish, but we must bear it.'

He says this again, not exalting himself, but teaching them—by the former words, humility; by these, courage and boldness of speech.

'I do not love it above this;'

'I count it more precious to finish the course, to testify solemnly.'

And he did not say, 'To preach,' 'To teach;'

but what? 'To testify the Gospel of the grace of God.'

He is about to say something rather weighty, that 'I am clean from the blood of all men;'

therefore he prepares the ground beforehand, and shows that nothing has been left undone.

Since, then, he was about to lay upon them the whole weight and burden, he first softened their mind, saying:

'And now, behold, I know that you all shall see my face no more.'

Then, at that point, he added: 'I am clean from the blood of all men.'

Both the 'they shall see his face no more,' and the 'all of them.'

'For you shall no longer,' he says, 'see my face—all you among whom I went about preaching the Kingdom.'

'So then, with good reason I testify to you, seeing I shall come among you no more, that I am clean from the blood of all men.'

'For I did not shrink from declaring to you the whole counsel of God.'

Do you see how he strikes fear, and presses upon their souls, already worn and afflicted? Rightly so, for it was necessary.

'For I did not shrink,' he says, 'from declaring to you the whole counsel of God.'

Therefore he who does not speak is answerable for the blood.

He shows that they too, if they do not act, are answerable for the blood.

And while he seems to be making a defense, he is in fact striking fear into them.

'Take heed therefore to yourselves, and to all the'

'flock, over which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to shepherd the Church of God, which He purchased with His own blood.'

So then, neither does setting others aright alone bring any gain (for 'I fear,' he says, 'lest, having preached to others, I myself should become disqualified'), nor does caring for oneself alone.

For such a one is self-loving, and seeks only his own, and is like the man who buried his talent.

He says these things, not because our own salvation is more precious than that of the flock, but because, when we take heed to ourselves, then the flock also profits.

'Over which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to shepherd the Church of God.'

'From the Spirit you have your ordination,' he says;

then, 'to shepherd the Church of God;'

and thirdly, 'which,' he says, 'He purchased with His own blood.'

By what he has said he shows how precious the matter is, and that the danger is not on behalf of small things, seeing that the Master, for the Church's sake, did not even spare His own blood—while we make light of the salvation of the brethren.

And He, that He might reconcile His enemies, even poured out His blood;

but you have not even the strength to hold fast those who have become your friends.

'For I know this, that after my departure grievous wolves shall enter in among you, not sparing the flock.'

Again from another quarter he turns them back—from the things that are to be:

'Our wrestling is not against blood and flesh.'

'For grievous wolves,' he says, 'shall enter in among you after my departure.'

The evil is twofold: that he himself is not present, and that others shall assail them.

'Why then do you depart, if you foresee this?' 'The Spirit draws me,' he says.

He did not simply say 'Wolves,' but added 'Grievous,' hinting at their fierceness and their reckless boldness;

and what is harder still, he says that these very ones shall rise up from among themselves;

which is also exceedingly grievous, when the war is even a civil one.

And well did he say, 'Take heed,' showing that the matter is exceedingly to be striven for (for it is the Church), and that the danger is great (for He redeemed it with blood), and that the war is great and twofold.

These things, then, he made plain, saying:

'And from your own selves shall men arise, speaking perverse things, to draw away the disciples after them.'

Then, since he had greatly alarmed them by saying 'Grievous wolves,' and that from among themselves would arise those who speak perverse things, as though at a loss over how then, and what safeguard there would be, he goes on to say:

'Watch, remembering that for three years, night and day, I ceased not to admonish every one with tears.'

'With tears, and night and day, and every single one.'

For it was not that when he saw a multitude, then he was sparing of his labor, but he knew how to do all things even for a single soul.

In this way, then, he also welded them together.

For three years I remained, and they were sufficiently strengthened, they were sufficiently rooted.

Do you see that the tears are shed for this purpose? Let us also do these things.

Feel the pain yourself, and perhaps he too will feel the pain.

Just as when a sick man sees his physician taking food, he too is encouraged to do the same,

so indeed it will also be in this case;

if he sees you lamenting, he will be softened, and will become a kind and gentle man.

'Not knowing,' he says, 'the things that shall befall me.'

What then? Do you depart on this account? By no means;

but rather I know full well that bonds and afflictions await me.

That trials await me, then, I know; but of what kind, I do not know.

Do not, therefore, suppose that I say these things as one bewailing them;

I do not count my own life precious.

In order that he might rouse up their mind, he says these things, and might persuade them not only not to flee, but even to bear it nobly.

For this reason he calls the matter a race and a ministry;

by the one, showing its splendor from the race; by the other, showing the obligation that arises from the ministry.

Having comforted them, that they might not grieve over the sufferings he endures, and having said that he endures these things with joy, and having shown the fruit thereof, then he brings in what is painful.

This he does, that he might not overwhelm their mind.

The words, 'And from among your own selves shall men arise, speaking perverse things.'

What then, someone might say: do you think so highly of yourself, that, if you depart, we die? I do not say this, he says, that my absence causes this;

but what? That certain men will rise up against you.

He did not say, 'Because of my departure,'

but, 'After my departure,'

and yet this has already come to pass;

and if it has come to pass, much more will it come to pass hereafter.

Then also the cause: 'To draw away the disciples after them.'

So that heresies exist for no other reason than this.

'Which He purchased,' he says, 'with His own blood.'

And if He purchased it with His own blood, He will assuredly stand as its protector.

'Night and day,' he says, 'I ceased not to admonish you with tears.'

These things might well be said to us also;

and though the saying seems to be directed particularly to the teachers, yet it is common also to the disciples.

For what, if I on my part speak and exhort and weep night and day, but the disciple will not be persuaded? For lest anyone should think that this suffices for a defense, namely to be a disciple and not to yield, therefore, having said, 'I testify,' he added:

'For I did not shrink from declaring to you.'

It is, then, the teacher's part only to declare, to preach, to teach, not to shrink back, to exhort night and day;

but when, though these things are done, nothing further comes of it, you know what remains.

namely, that 'I am pure from the blood of all men.'

Do not, then, suppose that these things are spoken to us only;

for indeed this word is addressed to you also, that you should give heed to the things spoken, that you should not leap away from the hearing.

What shall I do? Behold, every single day I am ready to burst with crying aloud:

Refrain from swearing, from covetousness;

we exhort a thousand times, and there is no one who listens.

But do I not discourse in the night? I could wish to do this even in the night, and at your very tables, if only it were possible, even split into a thousand pieces, to come to you and discourse;

but if once a week we call you, and you are reluctant, and some of you do not even come, while others who come go away having gained nothing more;

what would you not have done, had we done this continually? What shall we do? Many, I know, even tear us to pieces, because we always discourse on the same subjects;

so wearisome have we become.

But the cause of this is not you, but the very hearers themselves.

For he who is living rightly always rejoices to hear the same things, as though praises of himself were being spoken;

but he who is unwilling to live rightly seems even to be annoyed, and though he hear it but a second time only, he often thinks he has heard it many times over.

'I am pure from the blood of all men,' he says.

This was fitting for Paul to say, but we do not dare to say this, being conscious in ourselves of ten thousand faults.

Therefore, to him who was ever watchful and vigilant, who endured all things for the salvation of those he was discipling, it was fitting to say this;

but we will say the word of Moses, that 'The Lord was angry with me for your sakes,' because you lead us on into many sins.

For when we are disheartened, seeing that you make no progress, does not the greater part of our strength collapse? For what, tell me, has happened? Behold, by the grace of God, we too have now had three years, not exhorting night and day, but doing this often every three or seven days.

What more has come of it? We accuse, we rebuke, we weep, we grieve, even if not openly, yet in our heart.

But those tears are far lighter than these;

for the former bring some consolation to those who grieve, but the latter intensify the grief and bind it tighter.

So also, when someone is in dejection, and is unable to bring out his pain, so as not to seem to be vainglorious, he then suffers more than if he had brought it out.

If someone did not judge me guilty of excessive love of display, you would see me every single day pouring forth fountains of tears;

but of these my little cell and my solitude are witnesses with me.

For believe me, I have despaired of my own salvation, but lamenting your affairs, I have not even leisure to mourn my own evils;

so entirely are you all things to me.

And if I perceive that you are making progress, I do not feel my own evils, for the pleasure of it;

and if I see that you are not making progress, then again through my dejection I am carried past my own concerns;

being cheerful over your good things, though I have ten thousand troubles, but gloomy over your griefs, though I have ten thousand successes.

For what hope is there for a teacher, when the flock has been corrupted? What life, what expectation? With what boldness will he stand before God? What will he say? For let us grant that he is not even accused, nor pays the penalty, but is pure from the blood of all men;

even so he will suffer things past all healing;

since fathers too, though they are not going to be called to account for their children, nevertheless feel pain and are stung to the heart.

And does this in no way profit them, he says, nor stand them in stead, that they themselves keep watch over our souls? But they keep watch as those who will render an account;

and to some this seems to be a fearful thing, but to me there is no account of this after your perdition.

For whether I render an account, or whether I do not render one, there is no benefit to me.

May it be granted that you be saved, and that I give account on your behalf;

that you be saved, and that I be called to account as one who did not fulfill what lay within my own power.

For I am not anxious that you be saved through me, but only that you be saved, by whatever means it may be.

You do not know the tyranny of spiritual birth-pangs, how a thousand times over the one who travails with such a birth would choose to be cut to pieces rather than to behold one of those brought forth perishing and destroyed. From what source shall we persuade you? From no other quarter at all, but from what is done we shall discharge our whole duty toward you.

We too are able to say that we have kept back nothing;

and that we grieve is plain from the countless devices we contrive and the means we employ.

And yet it was possible to say to your very selves:

What is it to me? I have done my own part, I am clean from the blood;

but this does not suffice for consolation.

If it were possible to lay open our heart and show it, you would see all of you within it with much spaciousness—women and children and men;

for such is the power of love: it makes the soul wider than heaven itself.

'Make room for us,' said Paul;

'we have wronged no one; you are not straitened in us.'

This we too now say;

that man had the whole of Corinth in his heart, and he said:

But I myself would not be able to say this;

for I know well that you also love us and make room for us.

But what profit is there either from my love or from yours, when what pertains to God does not go forward among us? It is ground for greater despondency, occasion for more grievous hurt.

For I bear you witness that, if it had been possible, you would have plucked out your own eyes and given them to me.

We yearn to give you not only the Gospel, but also our very own souls.

but this is not what is sought.

Let us therefore love Christ first;

for the first commandment is, 'You shall love the Lord your God;'

and the second is like it: 'And your neighbor as yourself.'

We have the second; we have need of the first;

the first is needed with much surpassing measure, both by me and by you.

We have it, but not as we ought.

you know how great a reward is laid up for those who love Christ;

let us love Him with fervor of soul, that, enjoying His good favor, we may escape the tempest of the present life, and be counted worthy to attain the good things promised to those who love Him, by the grace and lovingkindness of His only-begotten Son, with whom, together with the Holy Spirit, be glory, might, and honor to the Father, now and ever, and unto the ages of ages.