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維埃納的阿維圖斯

詩集與書信 第 45 章

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45:1
Diu est si aut verbo meo creditis, aut de affectu mutuo digna sentitis, quod litteras aliquas vestri sumere desiderans, plus tamen officii mei offerre cupiebam, quod in persona vestra, diltctioni primum, deinde necessitudini, ad ultimum dignitati a me debentur. Non semper debemus occasionibus commeantum solvenda committere: quia licet et ipsa nobis opportunitas portitorum propter frequentiam debeat Me votiva, necesse tamen cst ut illa sollicitudo praecellat, quæ se appetitu proprio, sine interventu alienæ necessitatis insinuat. Hujus obsequii me obnoxium sciens, intercludi redhibitionem justam injusto obstaculi præpedientis obice jarndudum tacitus ingemiscebant.
早已如此了——你若相信我的話,或對我們彼此的情誼有相稱的體會——就是我雖渴望收到你的一些書信,卻更願先奉上我自身職責的效勞,此職責在你身上,我首先虧欠於情感,其次虧欠於親密之誼,最後虧欠於尊位。我們不當總把該履行之事託付給旅人往來的機緣:因為信差往來的頻繁固然本當使這機緣為我們所樂求,卻仍必須讓那出於自身心願、無需藉他人所需為介的殷勤更為卓越。我既自知虧欠於此敬意,早已默默哀歎那正當的償還被那阻攔障礙的不義柵欄所截斷。
It is long ago — if you either believe my word or feel worthily of our mutual affection — that, desiring to receive some letters of yours, I nonetheless wished the more to offer the office of my own duty, which in your person is owed by me first to affection, then to close bond, and lastly to dignity. We ought not always to commit things to be discharged to the occasions of travelers: for although the very opportunity of bearers ought, by its frequency, to be desirable to us, it is nonetheless necessary that that solicitude should excel which insinuates itself by its own appetite, without the intervention of another's need. Knowing myself bound to this homage, I long ago groaned in silence that the just repayment was cut off by the unjust barrier of an impeding obstacle.
45:2
Pervenerat quippe, non ad notitam tantummodo, sed ad mœstitiam nostram, dispositi fumus incendii, quod sanctam ac simplicem innocentiam vestram, velut de effetis cineribus, conjnratio procellosa ventis mendacibus sulflans, in cassum movere tentaverat. Ob quam causam verebamur anxietatis vestrae sarcinam voto libaminis aggravare, et mœroris augmentum pro consolatione transmittere. Sub hujus ergo ambiguitatis nubilo confusa exspectatione pendentibus, litteras vestras, serenitatis pristinæ, pietatis experta, inopinanti mihi Deus obtulit. Recognovi illic, qua satis delectatus sum, manum vestram, qua pius, paternam declamationem, qua maxime, hæreditariam benignitatem.
因為那已臨到——不僅臨到我們的知曉,更臨到我們的哀傷——就是一場已備妥之火的煙,一場如從燒盡的灰燼中、以謊言之風吹拂的暴烈陰謀,曾徒然企圖攪動你那聖潔而樸實的無辜。因此我們唯恐以獻祭的許願加重你憂慮的重擔,並以哀愁的增添代替安慰而傳送給你。於是,當我們在這疑雲之下、以困惑的期待懸而未決時,神在我意料之外,把你的書信賜給我——那顯出你昔日明朗、久經考驗之虔誠的書信。我在其中認出——這使我大為喜悅——你的手筆;其中虔敬地,是父親般的宣講;其中尤為特出的,是那承襲而來的仁慈。
For there had come — not only to our notice, but to our grief — the smoke of a fire prepared, which a stormy conspiracy, blowing with lying winds as though from spent ashes, had attempted in vain to stir up against your holy and simple innocence. On which account we feared to aggravate the burden of your anxiety by the vow of an offering, and to transmit an increase of grief in place of consolation. As we hung, then, under the cloud of this uncertainty, in confused expectation, God, when I did not expect it, offered me your letters — of your former serenity, of proven piety. There I recognized — at which I was sufficiently delighted — your hand; wherein, piously, a fatherly declamation; wherein, most of all, a hereditary benignity.
45:3
Scripsistis igitur, Christo praestante, jam rcduces, omnia tuta esse, circaque vos dignationem domni regis Alarici illæsam et pristinam permanere. Quanquam ego censeam, quod post quamcunque nutationem, gratia talium personarum ita sine augmento non redditur, sicut sine periculo non finitur. Volunt enim quasi satisfacere innocentiæ lacessitæ, tumque eligunt credidisse cum cernunt: et sic eis conscientia nostra sufficit, si scientia sua testis accedit. Ego tamen nuntio vestrae, imo nostræ securitatis accepto, ecce Deo teste loquor, in lacrymas mixtas laetitiae præteritorum recordalione prorupi. Animum namque, ut ait vester poeta (Æneid. II).
那麼,你寫道——因基督賜恩——你如今已平安歸來,萬事安穩,你四周有阿拉利克王主上的眷顧,仍完好無損、一如往昔。雖然我認為:在任何動搖之後,這等人物的恩眷之收回若非有所增益便不算收回,正如其終止若非有所危險便不算終止。因為他們彷彿要向一份受過攻擊的無辜作出補償,然後在親眼看見之時才甘願採信:如此,我們的良心對他們便已足夠,只要他們自身的認知也作為見證加入。然而,我既收到你——不,是我們——平安的通報,看哪,我以神為證而言,我在追念往事之際迸發出摻雜喜樂的淚水。因為我的心,正如你們的詩人所言(《埃涅阿斯紀》卷二),
You wrote, then, Christ granting it, that now returned safely, all things are secure, and that around you the regard of the lord king Alaric remains unharmed and as of old. Although I would judge that, after any wavering whatsoever, the favor of such persons is not so given back without increase as it is not ended without danger. For they wish, as it were, to make satisfaction to an innocence that has been assailed, and then choose to have believed when they perceive: and thus our conscience suffices for them, if their own knowledge comes as witness. I, however, having received the announcement of your — nay, our — security, behold, I speak with God as witness, I burst into tears mingled with joy at the recollection of things past. For my mind, as your poet says (Aeneid II),
45:4
subiit cari genilocis imago, ut memoria retractavi, usque ad nostras quamlibet dispari professione personas, quamdam e parentum communium sortem parilitale laborum itividia exsequente perduci. Illa tamen in Dei nomine etiam nobis suppetit, quae illis consolatio fuit: quod toto aemulorum nisu, toto circumlatrantis undique livoris dente tentata, quotiescunque appeti visa est, criminationi subjacuit familia nostra, non crimini. Quoniam si vos a patre vestro Archadio didicistis, virum sæculo militantem minus inter arma quam in-.ter ter obloquia periclitari; nec ego parum exempli a Sidonio meo quem patrem vocare non audeo, quantum clericus perpeti possit assumo.
『一位親愛雙親的影像浮現於它』——當我在記憶中反覆思量之際,直到我們的身分本身,儘管職業何等不同,卻有某種共同先祖的命運,以勞苦的均等被牽引下來,妒忌緊隨其後。然而那曾屬於他們的安慰,也奉神之名向我們可得:就是說,我們的家門被仇敵的一切努力所攻擊、被四面吠叫的青灰般惡意的每一顆牙所啃噬,每逢它顯得受攻擊之時,所躺臥其下的乃是控告,而非罪行。因為你若從你父親阿卡狄烏斯那裡學到:服事世界之人,在兵器之間所遭的危險,少於在譭謗之間所遭的;那麼我也從我自己的西多尼烏斯——我不敢稱他為父——取得不少榜樣,得知一位聖職人員能忍受何等之多。
'there stole upon it the image of a dear parent' — as I turned it over in memory, right down to our persons, however unlike in profession, that a certain lot of common forebears is drawn on with an equality of labors, envy pursuing it. Yet that consolation which was theirs is available in God's name to us also: namely, that, assailed with every effort of rivals, with every tooth of a livid malice barking on all sides, as often as it seemed to be attacked, it was our household that lay under the accusation, not under the crime. For if you learned from your father Arcadius that a man serving the world is imperiled less amid arms than amid revilings, neither do I take little of example from my own Sidonius — whom I do not dare to call father — as to how much a cleric can endure.
45:5
Quocirca illud Divinitas tribuat, ut nobis quam novum non est talia objici, tam nos nulla novitas merito faciat accusari. Sed desistat nunc laetitiae tempor e, amaritudinis ex opportunitate sermo perstrictus: quin potius ineptia vacantis audaciæ unde rideatis exhibeat. Ante ali. quot menses datas ad amicum quemdam communem magnificentiæ vestrae litteras vidi, quibus salutatione praefata, in epistolae declamantes parte succidua, scribebatis d placuisse vobis libellos, quos inter occupationes seria et magis necessaria conscribendi, nihilominus tamen de spiritalis historiæ gestis etiam lege poematis lusi.
所以,願神明賜下這事:正如此等事被拋向我們並非新鮮,願也沒有任何新奇之事使我們理當受控。但讓那從苦澀的機緣中略加觸及的言談,如今從喜樂的題旨中止住;不如說,讓閒散膽識的拙劣,供你有些可笑之處。數月前我看見一封寫給你尊駕某位共同友人的信,你在慣常的問候之後、在信的末段暢言道:那些小書使你喜悅——就是我在撰寫嚴肅而更為必要之事的忙碌之中,卻仍彷彿以詩歌的方式、就屬靈歷史的事蹟而戲筆所作的。
Wherefore may the Divinity grant this: that, as it is nothing new for such things to be cast at us, so no novelty may make us deservedly accused. But let the discourse, briefly touched from the opportunity of bitterness, now desist from the theme of gladness; nay rather, let the ineptitude of idle boldness furnish something for you to laugh at. Some months ago I saw letters given to a certain common friend of your Magnificence, in which, after the customary salutation, declaiming in the closing part of the epistle, you wrote that the little books had pleased you which — amid occupations of writing serious and more necessary things — I nonetheless had, as it were, played with, in the manner of a poem, upon the deeds of spiritual history.
45:6
Hic nunc nihil falso, nihil assentatorie me loqui, coram sinceritate vestra imprecor testem Deam, tantum me tuo judicio delectatum, veluti si auribus domui mei patris tui meditata confessus, cujuscunque laudis momento sub censore donarer. Primum namque gaudebam, quod sensum vestrum huic liberius quam alteri pandebatis. Deinde quod agnovi, vos aliquod bonum de conatu fraterni operis non minus velle quam credere: certe meritis dictionis non quantum volebalis inveniis, supplere vos volo quod non poteratis implere judicio.
如今在此,我毫不虛假、毫不諂媚地言說,我在你真誠的面前呼求神為證:我因你的評斷而喜悅之深,就彷彿我把自己精心的默想向我父家的耳中傾訴,而在一位評鑑者之下、承受任何一種稱讚的分量。因為我首先歡欣:你把你的心意向這一位比向別人更坦然地敞開。其次,我認出你不僅相信、也同樣願意從一位弟兄之作的努力中生出某些美善:誠然,你若按這著作的優劣未能尋見你所盼望的那麼多,我願你以你的評斷來補足你所無法成就的。
Here now that I say nothing falsely, nothing flatteringly, I call God to witness before your sincerity, that I was as much delighted by your judgment as if, having confessed my studied meditations to the ears of my father's house, I were bestowed under a censor by the weight of praise of whatever kind. For first I rejoiced that you laid open your sense to this one more freely than to another. Then, that I recognized you willed no less than believed some good to come from the endeavor of a brotherly work: certainly, if by the merits of the composition you do not find as much as you wished, I want you to supply by your judgment what you could not fulfill.
45:7
Libellum tamcn amicus, qui ut puto ad vos pervenire fecit, non de librarii, sed adhuc ex notarii manu, adeo mihi inemendalum crudumque præripuit, ut non facile denotes, auctoris magis scriptorisve vitiis irascaris. Quapropler opusculum ipsum in membranis redactum, nec adhuc quanta volueram correctione politum, ne moram desiderio meo facerem, celeriter destinavi. Si revera non solum amantibus, sed et judicantibus vobis placet, quoniam apud extraneos forte non deerit quem audacis conatus tangat invidia, abunde mihi sufficit, ut vos quod cupio sentiatis, quia sicut non minus ad meam quam vestram gloriam pervenit, communis Sollii opus illustrare:
然而那小書——照我所想使它傳到你手中的那位朋友,是在它尚未經抄書手之手、還在速記手之手時,就從我這裡奪走了它,如此未經修訂而粗糙,以致你難以判定你該對作者還是抄手的錯處更加惱怒。所以,這篇小作既已謄寫於羊皮紙上、卻尚未如我所願地加以充分修訂潤飾,我便迅速將它寄出,免得為我自己的心願造成延誤。它若真使你喜悅——不僅作為愛者,更作為評判者——既然在外人之中,或許不乏因大膽之舉的妒忌所觸動之人,那麼你能體會我所渴望的,便已綽綽有餘地使我滿足,因為使索利烏斯的共同之作生輝,既不亞於為你的榮耀、也是為我的榮耀:
Yet the little book — the friend who, as I think, caused it to reach you snatched it from me not yet from the hand of a copyist, but still from the hand of a shorthand-writer, so uncorrected and raw that you would not easily note whether you should be angry rather at the faults of the author or of the scribe. Wherefore the little work itself, drawn up on parchment and not yet polished with as much correction as I had wished, I have quickly dispatched, lest I make a delay for my own desire. If indeed it pleases you — not only as lovers, but as judges — since among strangers there will perhaps not be lacking one whom the envy of a bold endeavor touches, it abundantly suffices me that you feel what I desire, because, just as it redounds no less to my glory than to yours to make illustrious the common work of Sollius:
45:8
ita vobis, favente Christo, militari actu magis magisque florentibus, si in minimis subtilius aliquid dignum lectione confecerit, etiam sine me quodcunque Ar chadium non puderet.
如此,蒙基督恩眷,當你在軍旅事業上愈發興盛之時,倘若在最微小之事上它成就了某種更為精微、值得一讀之物,那麼即使沒有我,它也將是任何一位阿卡狄烏斯無需引以為恥之物。
so, with Christ favoring, as you more and more flourish in military exploit, if in the least things it accomplishes something more subtle worthy of reading, then even without me it would be whatever Arcadius need not be ashamed of.
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